A Psalm to God

Do you have a favorite psalm that is your go-to scripture? Is there a psalm that you most identify with? Is there a psalm that seemed to capture the very essence of what you were feeling at a point in time?

The psalms were a way for the people of the Ancient Near East to offer prayers, praise, or laments to God. In very poetic language, they described the majesty and splendor of God. Many psalms were a lament for whatever the evil of the day was and an opportunity to express righteous indignation for whatever said evil was. You can experience the depth of the relationship the psalmist had with God by how and what they wrote.

Fortunately for us, the psalms and the art of writing psalms was not just for the people of old. We have the privilege to bare our souls before God in praise, supplication, and in lament. A few months ago, our pastor in church gave us the opportunity to explore Psalm 13 as a prototype for writing psalms. I encourage you to read this Psalm when you have the time. The general idea is that this Psalm offers something of a formula to follow when trying to write a psalm:

  1. Express how you feel
  2. Remember the greater story of what God is doing
  3. Recognize God’s salvation
  4. Rejoice in God’s goodness

Based on this formula, the pastor gave us the opportunity to write our own psalms to God (Interestingly enough, my daily journal also encouraged me to do something similar). So after reflecting on how I was feeling and how my 2022 had shaped up to be, I wrote this psalm to God:

I am lost and feeling directionless

But I remember that your purpose was to seek and save that which was lost

You are the way; the one pointing my feet where they need to go

You are my truth, when the world screams what is your truth and encourages multiple truths

And today, I trust you because even though my life feels directionless, it really isn’t because you O God, are my life

Yes I know it does not rhyme and is not poetic but in that moment this was the baring of my soul to God. In fact, I have gone back to this psalm a few times in the past few weeks since writing it and have found strength in the words I wrote to God.

Is there something you would like to tell God today? Do you have a praise report, a burning request, or a lament to take up with God? Well, friend, consider writing a psalm to God.

Yours Truly

Caption this…

How many times this week have you prayed for things you need? Did you have a list of things in mind that you presented to God or one specific thing? Have you already imagined when and how the answer to that prayer should come? Well… this week It has become very obvious to me that this is how I pray. I either come to God presenting a list of things that I need or sometimes it is for one specific major thing. And a lot of times I already envision how and when that need is to be met.

While this approach makes me very specific in my supplications, it also leaves very little room for allowing for God’s sovereignty in my life- particularly when the answers do not come when and how I was expecting. In the past weeks I have been thinking about the story of Jairus and his request of healing for his daughter. So for context, there was a Synagogue Leader circa Jesus’ times who once approached Jesus to come home with him and heal his daughter who was sick. That was a very specific request Jairus had and perhaps he had imagined how this was going to go- Jesus would follow him home with a large crowd of onlookers following, then Jesus would publicly say a few word like ” take your mat and walk” or spit in some sand which he would rub on her, or maybe would command a demon out of her or better still place his hands on her and instantly she will be healed. Whatever Jesus’ methods, Jairus was positive that if Jesus came to his house, his daughter would be healed. So he set about carrying his plan into action. Step 1. Earnestly plead with Jesus to come home with him…CHECK. Step 2. Jesus would agree to do so… CHECK. Step 3. His daughter would be healed… ERRRM….. Hello Jesus! Why have you stopped to ask who touched you? There is a crowd around you and the focus is to get to my house and heal my daughter. Why have you stopped? Excuse me! Who is this woman with the issue of blood who is throwing a monkey wrench into my plans?

We can speculate about how Jairus felt about this interruption to his plans. I do not know what was going on his mind when Jesus stopped to deal with something else but I know how I would have felt and reacted. Even if I did not show it, I would have been seething inside. I would have been furious! I know because I have been here many times where it seems like the answer to my prayers have stalled and how I envisioned my prayers would be be answered is not panning out like I imagined. I might stay in this story for a few posts because there is a lot I have learned in the past few weeks but today I will just dwell on two lessons.

Lesson One: What you think you need may not be what God knows you need

Jairus came to Jesus with a need for healing. His daughter was sick and what he thought his daughter needed was healing and so he asked for healing. He aligned himself to receive healing. But somewhere between his request and his answered prayer, something went awry. Jesus stopped to attend to someone else and while he was doing so, Jairus’ daughter died:

While Jesus was still speaking, some people came from the house of Jairus, the synagogue leader. “Your daughter is dead,” they said. “Why bother the teacher anymore?” Overhearing what they said, Jesus told him, “Don’t be afraid; just believe.”

Mark 5:35-36 NIV

Every hope of having his need met had just evaporated. He asked for healing and now the sick person was dead and so if you ask me, he had every reason to despair. But the truth of the matter was that Jairus’ daughter and family did not need to experience healing, their need was for more than just healing. What they needed was resurrection. Everything that was dead in their lives and in the lives of the people around them needed to have an encounter with the one who was LIFE himself. And so Jesus encouraged him: JUST BELIEVE.

Lesson Two: Jairus had to let go of his assumptions and expectations and simply trust Jesus in that moment of fear, doubt, disappointment, and maybe anger. And more often than not his is all we need to do- Just Believe. We do not need to speculate on or envision the how, where, when and who of our answered prayers. Just present our needs and believe that God who knows what is best for us, knows exactly what we need and will give us just that in due season.

For your Father knows exactly what you need even before you ask him! 

Matthew 6:8

Remember, just like we do not hear God when we have already decided what He should be saying, so do we not see His hand at work when we decide how our needs should be met. So this week, I had a hard time putting a title to this post. Now that you have read through the post, what is your takeaway? How would you caption this post based on what God is saying to you?

Yours Truly

From Clay to Masterpiece

In my last post, I started on this train of thought of the messiness of life and how God wants to get in the middle of our mess; because we were made from dust and dust is messy and God always remembers that we are dust (if you did not catch that post you can do so by clicking this link). This week, I will remain on that soapbox a little while longer and dwell in the mystery of that..

So a couple weeks ago, I was really wrestling with myself and with God about the bout of unanswered prayers that have been staring me tauntingly in the face and at some point I concluded within myself that it was pointless to pray, convincing myself that God will do whatever He wants anyway. In not wanting to lose my place in my daily bible readings, I still picked up my bible, not expecting to hear from God but just to go through the motions and get it over with But God decided to speak to me anyway. Here was the verse that jumped out at me from my readings:

“What sorrow awaits those who argue with their Creator. Does a clay pot argue with its maker? Does the clay dispute with the one who shapes it, saying, ‘Stop, you’re doing it wrong!’ Does the pot exclaim, ‘How clumsy can you be?’

Isaiah 45:9 NLT

This scripture hit me in a unique way and even though I did not want to engage in dialogue with God at the time, this scripture has stayed in the recesses of my mind. The reason it was so significant was that before I started reading my bible, I was lamenting within myself about “if only God would do this or do that then I would be in a better place” In essence, I was saying to God, “you are doing it wrong! I think there is a better way you can be taking care of me!” You see, a few days earlier, I had read this scripture also (I read it in the NIV but I am posting the NLT version because that really brings the point home):

How foolish can you be? He is the Potter, and he is certainly greater than you, the clay! Should the created thing say of the one who made it, “He didn’t make me”? Does a jar ever say, “The potter who made me is stupid”?

Isaiah 29:16 NLT

Wow! such a harsh dose of reality! I am but clay in God’s hands although sometimes.. ok.. many times.. I have acted as though I hold all the cards! I act as though I am the boss of God and his sole purpose is to do my bidding…speak of a pot thinking it is better that the potter and knows how best it should be formed. While such complacent thinking definitely calls for repentance on my part, truth is clay needs to be workable in the hands of the potter- its not always all up to the potter. Sometimes I watch videos of potters at work behind the wheel (because that is so relaxing) and sometimes the pottery do not turn out the way the potter intended. Usually, good potters do not give up on the clay. They will either start afresh or work with the clay to redesign the pottery- with the end goal of a masterpiece. This illustration reminds me of a scripture:

The LORD gave another message to Jeremiah. He said, “Go down to the potter’s shop, and I will speak to you there.” So I did as he told me and found the potter working at his wheel. But the jar he was making did not turn out as he had hoped, so he crushed it into a lump of clay again and started over. Then the LORD gave me this message: “O Israel, can I not do to you as this potter has done to his clay? As the clay is in the potter’s hand, so are you in my hand. 

Jeremiah 18: 1-6 NLT

Reading that scripture in context points to the place a surrendered will has in the creation of a masterpiece. God’s intention and plan for everyone is a plan for good and not evil to give each of us a future and a hope (Jer 29:11). The part we play in this is plan is to surrender ourselves to the will of the potter (God’s will) so that as he works with the clay (us) at the wheel (life’s circumstances), we turn out to be the masterpiece He intentioned. So back to my misguided thought that God will do whatever He want anyway so why bother pray?

One of the primary purposes of prayer is to align our will with God’s. Jesus taught us to pray saying, “your will be done on earth as it is in heaven”. Aligning our will with God’s in prayer is even more important when we find ourselves in a dark place; a place of hopelessness, depression, desperation, disappointment, or despair. When instead of a beautiful pot I turn out to just be a lump of clay, that is ok, as long as I am still in the potter’s hand… He will turn this clay into a masterpiece.

Yours truly

All because we do not carry…

The past few weeks have been fraught with worrying for me and when I worry, I pace and talk to myself. I imagine at length the situations that are stressing me out or have the potential to stress me out and talk myself through them. This has been one on my coping mechanisms for many years.

This weekend, I found myself in one such spot. I had confined myself to my room and paced about talking to myself for almost an hour non-stop. After a while, I paused to freshen up and my daughter came to me and said “Mummy, are you done praying?” I remained silent for awhile unsure of how to respond. I had spent almost an hour talking through my worry and stress and I had not once in that time invited God into that conversation. In that moment, I was overcome with many emotions but prominent among them was gratitude that my kiddo knows that we have such a privilege to talk to God about anything and a little shame that I had not done that. The words of Joseph M. Scriven from the hymn “what a friend we have in Jesus” flooded my mind:

Oh, what peace we often forfeit
Oh, what needless pain we bear
All because we do not carry
Everything to God in prayer

I don’t know what you are going through right now. But if I have learned anything today, it is that I can trust God with my worry and stresses, He is waiting to be invited into those conversations.

Yours Truly.

Prayer is not a grocery list

So a few days ago I interviewed for an opportunity and prior to the interview, I had spent days praying about it and preparing for it. So many people also prayed with me and by  the day of the interview I knew I could not have been any more prepared than I was. After waiting for days after the interview, I finally received the dreaded rejection email… “you did great but we decided to go another way”… and boy was I disappointed (and honestly maybe I still am just a little bit)!

For the rest of the day and week, I did not know how to react. I had asked that God’s will be done and now that His will had not gone my way, I was upset. I started searching for some encouragement from the bible, from songs and from social media and a few days ago my encouragement came. A friend sent me a video featuring the late Ravi Zacharias and he said:

In the Christian worldview prayer is not a grocery list of requests before God… prayer is not seeking to change the will of God. It is communion with the living God such that he will change you to have the ability to receive what it is that He has for you. Ravi Zacharias

I felt chastised. To have thought that because I have prayed and others had prayed that automatically meant that I would be selected for that opportunity was very presumptous. Up until now, I have been of the mindset that prayer changes the mind and will of God to be favourable towards us. And while I am still learning more about prayer, I ask myself, “If I am praying to change the will of the all-knowing and all-powerful God, whose will is nothing short of perfection, then whose will am I seeking for in my life?”

I realized that I prayed that God’s will be done for me regarding that opportunity but I was disappointed with the outcome because in reality what I was saying was “God I want you to give it to me regardless of what your plans are for me.” This month, I am learning what it means to surrender your will to God and I now know it is easier to blog about it than to actually live it.

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is–his good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12: 2 NIV

I need a transformation in my mindset to be able to live a fully surrended life – I am strong-willed! I need a transformation in how I pray and what I use the privilege of prayer for. Prayer is not to impose my will on God but as Ravi rightly said, to ask that God will renew my mind to be able to accept His will as the ultimate in my life. I am humbled by these thoughts and I pray God helps me.

What about you? What does prayer mean to you? Share your comments below.

Yours Truly