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Identity- Our Sense of Self

My drive in life comes from a fear of being mediocre. That is always pushing me. I push past one spell of it and discover myself as a special human being but then I feel I am still mediocre and uninteresting unless i do something else. Because even though I have become somebody, I still have to prove that I am somebody. My struggle has never ended and I guess it will never end.

Madonna

I recently came across this quote from Madonna and how truly apt it is for many of us. Even without all the fame and acclaim like Madonna has, our sense of self, self-worth and desire to be “somebody” are insatiable. Towards the end of last year, I faced a lot of turmoil and upheaval at my place of work which led me to an identity crisis. Everything that I had come to believe about who I was and my motivations in life no longer made any sense. As I have searched for answers in scripture, reassuring words of loved ones, counselling, among others, one question has stood out for me: what have I based my identity on?

We go through life looking for the ultimate verdict that we are important and valuable and we look for that ultimate verdict in situations and people around us. Our identities become rooted in our accomplishments or in our failures. There is an invisible standard set for us either by ourselves or by others and we strive to live up to these standards each day. Our self-esteem is driven by whether or not we are able to meet the standards. So we fluctuate between high and low self-esteem because every minute our lives are on trial- some days we feel we are winning and other days we feel we are losing the trial. We judge ourselves and we allow the judgment of others to condemn or acquit us each day. But the truth is that trying to find self-esteem and build an identity by living up to a set of standards is a trap. I recently read a book by Timothy Keller, The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness- The Path to Christian Joy, that shed light on a way to be free from the entrapment of this skewed view of self-identity. Using the example of Paul from 1st Corinthians 3:21- 4:7, Keller states:

When [Paul] says he will not let the Corinthians judge him nor will he judge himself, he is saying that he knows about his sins but does not connect them to himself and his identity. His sins and his identity are not connected. He refused to play that game. He does not see a sin and let it destroy his sense of identity. He will not make a connection. Neither does he see an accomplishment and congratulate himself. He sees all kinds of sin in himself- and all kinds of accomplishments too- but he refuses to connect them with himself or his identity.

All too often, we allow our accomplishments, achievements, shortcomings, or failures to be what defines us. If our accomplishments define us and something threatens that or we receive negative criticisms then we feel undone. If someone has been defined their whole life by a certain profession and then due to unforeseen circumstances like an illness, they can no longer practice in that field, their whole life falls apart. They ask questions like, “who am I if I am not a ________!” Similarly if someone has been defined by their material possessions and wealth and through a bad investment, an economic downturn, or fraud, they lose their wealth, it is game over. Today I offer a reassurance: THE ULTIMATE VERDICT IS IN.

Here is the ultimate verdict- the trial is over. There is no more condemnation for you if you are in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:1). God does not care about who you are (accomplished or not) or what you have done (good or bad). Your performance does not lead to a verdict. The moment you chose to believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, His righteousness was imputed to you. You do not have to perform to gain your identity. You have an identity as a child of the King of Kings and based on this identity, what you do will flow out of who you are. As my pastor shared in his sermon last week, Jesus loves you and accepts you for one reason and one reason only: You are His! Just as God once said of Jesus, He says of you: You are my beloved child in whom I am well pleased. You do not have to impress yourself or anyone for that matter. You are already achieved! You are a son or daughter of the Most High King. You are loved beyond measure! You can go about your life doing the things you do, not to build up a resume or to look good. You are a doctor, a lawyer, a nurse, a street vendor, a cashier, carpenter, plumber, [insert what you do] not to feel better about yourself or to feel accomplished or to feel like “somebody”. You can strive for a better paid job or for higher education not because you derive your identity from that. You can let go of the anxieties, the disappointments of life, and the guilt because you do not find your identity in your accomplishments or failures. This is the blessedness of being redeemed.

Has the LORD redeemed you? Then speak out! Let the redeemed of the LORD say so.

Psalm 107: 2 NLT/ BSB

Yours Truly

Resources: https://www.backtothebible.ca/product/the-freedom-of-self-forgetfulness/

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Accept or Reject?

Earlier in the month I shared with you that my mandate from the LORD for 2024 was to consciously and intentionally accept Him everyday; and almost everyday of this year so far, I hear or read something that reminds me of this mandate. For example, on January 6th, my daughter’s bible devotion was titled “choose” and the message was very interesting. The scripture was from Judges 21:25

In those days Israel had no king; all the people did whatever seemed right in their own eyes.

Judges 21:25 NLT

The devotional’s author suggested that the cliches “follow your truth” and “you do you” are not new at all! In fact rewind a few thousand years and the Israelites were living the “you do you ” life! Everyone followed their own truth and it was a godless and debased time in the history of the Israelites. Sounds familiar? Let’s fast forward back to 2024.

Yesterday my daily bible readings led me to the book of Isaiah, Chapter 1 to be precise, and here we hear God speaking to the Israelites about their choices. In their actions, words, thoughts, worship, service, they had rejected God everyday and God was telling them He was tired of being rejected! He was lamenting over Israel’s choosing to continue in their own waywardness and rebellion. They had turned their backs on the LORD (vs. 4). And their lives were a sight for sore eyes: they were physically, emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually battered. As scripture described it, their heads were injured and their hearts were sick (vs. 5-6) and their worship which they thought might bring them closer to God rather became detestable to Him. The simple reason was this: they continued to reject God. Just before year 2023 ended, I heard a preacher say this, “If you keep saying “NO” to God and continue to reject Him, one of these days God will accept your NO and visit His judgment on you”. And guess what, that is exactly what God is saying to the Israelites in Isaiah Chapter 1:15. He says:

“When you lift up your hands in prayer, I will not look. Though you offer many prayers, I will not listen…”

Isaiah 1:15 NLT

But all is not lost for rebellious Israel and neither is it for us today. Our Redeeming God offers a solution. “Come now, let’s settle this,” says the LORD. “Though your sins are like scarlet, I will make them as white as snow. Though they are red like crimson, I will make them as white as wool…” (Isaiah 1:18 NLT). But there is a caveat: We have to choose to accept Him and everything He offers! Do you feel beaten down and battered by life? Are your prayers appearing to not reach God’s ears? God wants to settle you! But first start with some self-reflection, is there something that you need to settle with God? In what areas of your life are you rejecting Him? One of the ways we reject God is by being so busy with the hustle and bustle of life that we leave little to no room for God’s presence or power in our lives. Isaiah 5:12 captures this so aptly:

They furnish wine and lovely music at their grand parties- lyre and harp, tambourine and flute- but they never think about the LORD or notice what he is doing.

Isaiah 5:12 NLT

When it comes to accepting God, I have a lot to learn and given my mandate for the year, I am sure I am going to learn a lot about this. If you are further along on the journey of what it means to accept and choose Jesus everyday or if God is teaching you something about this in your daily walk with Him, please feel free to share with me, leave a comment, I am excited to learn from you. This year I plan to be intentional about thinking about God every day and to notice what He is doing in my life, among the people in my sphere of influence, and in the world at large. I want to pay attention to what God is saying and requiring of me. That is one of the ways I want to accept Him each day. How? I will engage with my readings each day and anticipate that God wants to tell me something from His word. I will pose questions to God as I read my bible and actively listen for answers throughout the day. I will not hesitate to pray for the things God lays on my heart or if people request prayer of me and excitedly anticipate God’s move in my life and in those of the people I pray for.

P.S. For those of you who are curious about my daily bible reading plan, I use the Olive Tree Bible app on my phone and this year I am following the 52-week bible plan, “A different Genre Each Day”. If you are looking for a reading partner, feel free to join me on this reading journey.

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Today is the Day!

Sometime in October of 2023, I went over all my goals for the year and realized I had fallen behind on so many of them (one of which was to post to the blog every week). Feeling discouraged, I decided that since too much of the year had passed to accomplish some of those goals, I would just wait till the new year and then start afresh. However, there was a scripture that kept tugging at my heart:

As has just been said: “Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as you did in the rebellion.” 

Hebrews 3:15 NIV

Today. Not next year, not next month, not next week, today! Many times, we take for granted that tomorrow is not guaranteed us and we put off for tomorrow what we can do today. January is a month where people push for change and it is a good time for change. Afterall, its the start of a new year! Many people just like myself will make new year’s resolutions and set goals for themselves to achieve through out the year and many of us will fall off the wagon of some of our resolutions before the month is out. Here are two thoughts on the matter- the first comes from my daughter’s devotional, and the second is a lesson from 2023:

First, before going through all the effort of trying to fulfill our goals whatever they may be, why not first slow down and submit them to God? Remember “in their hearts humans plan their course but the LORD establishes their steps (Proverbs 16:9 NIV).” God wants us to submit our plans to him- our wonderful ideas for a successful 2024 and ask Him what He wants to work on this January and Febrauary and every month thereafter. In doing this, you will find a satisfying journey with a Friend rather than an exhausting and lonely marathon to accomplishing your goals.

Secondly, if you start to renege on your goals- perhaps you have already missed a few days of your 365-day bible reading plan, or your exercise regime, or you have already fallen back into patterns and behaviours you were hoping to change this year, it is not too late to course correct. It is never ever too late to fix what is broken, to jump back into relationship with God, to take care of your emotional, physical, and spiritual health, to let go of that hurt or guilt, to forgive…today is the day. Although bright hope for eternity is promised us, another day on this side of eternity is not guaranteed to anyone.

Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business, and make a profit.” You do not even know what will happen tomorrow! What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.

James 4: 13- 14 NIV

So today is the day. Whatever it is that you are putting off, today is the day.

Yours Truly

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Hello 2024

At the end of every year, my husband and I spend time reflecting, praying, and asking God for a word or scripture that will guide our lives for the upcoming year; what we call our mandate for the year. Last year’s mandate was a very interesting one. It came from the book of revelations:

I know your deeds; you have a reputation for being alive, yet you are dead. Wake up and strengthen what remains, which was about to die; for I have found your deeds incomplete in the sight of My God. Remember, then, what you have received and heard. Keep it and repent. If you do not wake up, I will come like a thief, and you will not know the hour when I will come upon you.

Revelations 3:1-3 NIV

With that mandate, I knew going into 2023 that it was destined to be an interesting and challenging year. What I did not know was that 2023 will be one of the longest years I had yet to experience! Although the days, weeks, and months flew by relatively quickly, the losses, disappointments, and failures I experienced in the year made each day feel so long and drawn out. Many times, it felt like what little I had left of my joy, peace,and sanity were being chipped at bit by bit and each of those times, the mandate was clear, “Wake up…strengthen what remains.” As I grasped dearly to promises and encouragements from scripture, songs, sermons, family, and well wishers, I was very cognizant of the first part of the mandate as well: “you have a reputation for being alive, yet you are dead.” Throughout the challenges of 2023, I kept asking God to show me the areas of my life were my deeds were incomplete and boy did those trials show me! I learnt so much about myself and my relationship with God as everything and I mean everything I have come to know about God was tested. I trust that in this beautiful year 2024, I will have ample opportunity to share more details of the lessons from 2023.

2024 will be another interesting year. There will be more to learn but this time, I am ready. I am prepared to trust God through the process and relinquish the reins to Him. It will be a year where I will need to learn to listen and obey. The leadings and promptings of God will be such rich currency to navigate 2024 as the world plunges into a financial recession. As morality continues to decline both in the church and in the world, walking in step with God will be important as I continue to strengthen what remains. My mandate for this new year is as clear as day: God is asking that each day I conciously and intentionally make a choice to accept Him. What does this mean? I am sure I will find out this year won’t I?

Well, I look forward to each day of 2024 and I receive each day with joy and thanksgiving and with anticipation of what God has in store for me. My guiding prayer for 2024 is found in none other than Psalm 86

Teach me your way, Lord, that I may rely on your faithfulness; Give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name.

Psalm 86:11 NIV

And I pray this for you as I pray this for myself today and for all 366 days of this year (Yes, its a leap year…exciting!).

Yours truly

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My confessions: Anger

Sometime in 2021, I started to notice little things that annoyed me greatly.  Slowly, these things built up and I became indignant… and then angry. For the past two years, my anger has felt justified… Of course, I have been wronged by so and so person… how inconsiderate of them! For a period of time, I was even angry at God! But while I have  been harbouring and  justifying my anger for these many months, it has become like a canker that has eaten away at my peace of mind and has made it difficult for me to realize God’s purpose in my life.

For the past few months, I have been praying  and asking God to help me find my way back and a few days ago, I had a dream. In the dream, I saw someone I have been upset at for almost a year, who looked at me  in the eye and asked, “why are you so angry at me?” I thought hard and long and realized I was unsure of exactly what I was mad at. When I  woke up, I asked God (well if I am honest, I was probably just asking myself) to show me why I was so angry. And to my surprise God answered and this is what He told me:

Anger is a seed that grows and becomes a deciduous tree. It forms deep roots in the heart of a person and with each anger-inducing incident, the roots get deeper and then it starts to bear fruits. The fruits include resentment, malice, hatred, depression, anxiety, rage, and murder.  To illustrate, God reminded me of the story of the impure spirit in Matthew 12: 44-45 that finds a conducive environment and brings seven other spirits more wicked than itself to come and occupy, making the final condition of the person worse than the first… anger works just like that. It starts as something small but if left unchecked, will slowly gain a foothold and occupy your heart; slowly pushing out the spirit of God from your heart and replacing the fruit of God’s spirit with its own fruits.

Anger in and of itself is not a bad thing, it has its good side too. It can be a very potent motivator but when we allow it to take control of us it becomes an inhibitor. That is why God admonishes in Ephesians 4:26-27, “In your anger do not sin; Do not let the sun go down while you are  still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.” Anger should run its course for a short period of time and then the issue must be resolved so the devil does not use that anger as a gateway into your heart.

So, what should we do when the time limit of anger is reached and the feeling of anger still persists? 1 Sam 15:11  gives us a clue: “Samuel was angry, and he cried out to the LORD all that night”. He recognized God’s sovereignty over everything and turned over the situation to God in prayer but he did not stop there. we read in verse 12 that he rose up early in the morning to confront King Saul (the object of his anger). After praying, Samuel took  tangible steps towards resolution.

 So, I asked God, “now that I am stuck in this funk of being angry all the time, how do I get out of it?” A good starting place is Psalm 51 (particularly verses 10-12):

Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.

Confess the anger to God and ask for a renewal of His spirit in your heart. The spirit of God will illuminate the areas where anger has brought darkness and restore joy back into your life. God’s spirit will continue His work of restoration and renewal by manifesting His fruit in your heart. You will experience more love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Gal 5:22-23) in your life and the anger that has taken root will slowly start to dissipate. You will find that you will become more forgiving and will start to become more oblivious to why you were angry, allowing you to let go of any ill-feelings towards others. The fruit of the Holy Spirit will help you deal with anger at its very roots: the more love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control you have, the less angry you will become at people and circumstances. And one day, you will wake up and realize you are not angry anymore. This will take some work and a willing heart. That is why God admonishes us with these words:

“… walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these… Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit” (emphasis mine).

Galatians 5:16-21; 25 KJV

Keeping in step with God’s Spirit  is a daily affair. God’s spirit will help us know when to be angry and when to let go. The Holy spirit will help us set limits and healthy boundaries for our anger. His work is to ensure that our lives reflect Jesus Christ and if anyone knows when to be angry and when to relent, we have an example in God through the pages of Scripture. What those limits and boundaries are will vary for each individual and each circumstance but the constant will be that  it will be spirit-led!

I would like to conclude with a prayer for more of God’s grace to be even-tempered and spirit-filled. Here is a compilation of some scriptures that caution against anger for your reading pleasure https://www.bible.com/search/bible?query=anger

Yours Truly

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Obedience: A matter of the heart

This past month, I have been on a roll with the theme of obedience and today I share the lessons I have learnt on obedience by looking at four different biblical characters: Moses, Saul, Gideon, and the unwilling son. For almost a year now, I have been ruminating on the parable of the unwilling son and what the implication of that story might be. And as I have followed the Israelites on their journey to the promised land, this story seems to be more relevant.

The parable of the two sons can be found in Matthew 21:28-32. The gist of the story is of a man with two sons who told them to go work in the vineyard. The first son refused, but later obeyed and went. The second son initially expressed obedience, but actually disobeyed and refused to work in the vineyard. The son who ultimately did the will of his father was the first son because he eventually obeyed. As I have studied obedience from this parable and through the lives of the Israelites, my biggest lesson has been that obedience is about the heart. Actions matter, in fact what we do matter a lot! But the state of one’s heart is even more important than what we do. King Saul, the first king of Israel is a perfect example of this lesson.

God had instructed that all the nations that the Israelites conquered be completely destroyed (people and livestock alike) but when Saul defeated the Amalekites, he decided to spare their king, Agag and keep the choicest animals for sacrifice to God. One might hear this story and think it was noble thing that Saul had done but God was not pleased. He rebuked Saul sternly,

“What is more pleasing to the LORD: your burnt offerings and sacrifices or your obedience to his voice? Listen! Obedience is better than sacrifice, and submission is better than offering the fat of rams”

The LORD does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”

1 Samuel 15:22 NLT and 1 Samuel 16: 7b NIV

Apart from the fact that the All-knowing God knew that one day, a descendant of King Agag named Haman would make it his life’s mission to wipe out all the jews from the face of the earth when he demanded the total destruction of the foreign nations, he was more concerned with the state of the heart of Israel’s ruler. A heart of obedience was a prerequisite for a long and fruitful reign (Deuteronomy 17:19). Saul’s grand gesture of saving the choicest livestock and sacrificing them contravened God’s edict and was in direct violation of the priestly mandate. His intentions did not matter, his actions even mattered less- because God saw his heart and he dishonored God in his heart and that cost him a great deal.

Moses was another person who dishonored God in his heart and it cost him greatly. Forty years had passed since the Israelites left Egypt to go to the land that the Lord had promised them. After camping in Kadesh, they ran out of water. When the people complained to Moses and Aaron, the Lord commanded Moses to speak to a rock so that water would miraculously gush from it. Instead of obeying the Lord, Moses chose to deliver an angry lecture to the people and then strike the rock twice with his staff. I have always wondered what was so bad about Moses hitting the rock with his staff when God had asked him to speak to the rock. Surely the Israelites deserved the stern rebuke! Why did his actions cost him the promise land even though the rock produced water? Well, scriptures clues us in that it was not so much about what he did as it was about his heart in that moment. Moses dishonored God in his heart and that spilled over into his angry outburst and actions. That is what God punished… the dishonor.

“…for when the community rebelled at the waters in the Desert of Zin, both of you disobeyed my command to honor me as holy before their eyes.”

Numbers 27:14 NIV

Many times, obedience is perceived with a “do not question; do as you are told” mentality. However, if obedience is more about the heart and less the actions, then there is opportunity to seek clarification and ask questions of God when we do not understand what is being asked of us. Gideon is a good example of this (Judges 6-8). I have been intrigued with the story of Gideon and how he appeared to question all of God’s directions without any repercussions. After carefully analyzing the story of Gideon, I conclude that even though he asked God to prove Himself over and over again, he never dishonored God in his heart through the process. His acts of questioning and clarifying were not acts of disobedience (dishonoring God in his heart) or blatant defiance and were actually welcomed by God. In this story, I see God respond to the frailty of humanity through tenderness. Gideon’s tests were designed to draw him into a deeper understanding of who God is and God indulged him.

An obedient heart may be one that has self doubt but says, “God, can you tell me some more about what you are asking of me?” “Can you show me what I ought to do and how I ought to do it?” An obedient heart may not always do the right thing but is quick to admit its wrongdoings and say “Create in me a clean heart and renew a right spirit within me.” An obedient heart may not be one that jumps for joy when asked by the Father to work in the vineyard but still goes any way.

My prayer for you and for myself is for a heart of obedience… and as our hearts respond in obedience to the King, may our actions follow suit.

Yours Truly

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Obedience: An art and act of warfare

Now that is an unusual title isn’t it? As I have journeyed along the Israelites from Egypt to the promised land in my bible study, I have discovered nuggets such as the one I would be sharing shortly, along the way. The Israelites had now entered the promised land under the leadership of Joshua and had conquered much land to call home. However, the Israelites did not drive out all the pagan nations from the land. God allowed some of the nations to remain to teach the new generation of Israelites two things: first, the art of warfare and second, that their victory in warfare came from obedience.

These are the nations the Lord left to test all those Israelites who had not experienced any of the wars in Canaan (he did this only to teach warfare to the descendants of the Israelites who had not had previous battle experience): the five rulers of the Philistines, all the Canaanites, the Sidonians, and the Hivites living in the Lebanon mountains from Mount Baal Hermon to Lebo Hamath. They were left to test the Israelites to see whether they would obey the Lord’s commands, which he had given their ancestors through Moses.

Judges 3:1-4 NIV

Throughout the lifetime of Joshua and the elders who had seen the great things that God had done, the Israelites served God faithfully but there came a generation after who neither knew God or the things he had done for Israel (Judges 2:10). Now while that in and of itself is problematic and bears pause, that is not the focus of this topic. The people quickly fell into a pattern of idol worship and consequent suffering under the strong hand of raiders and nations who oppressed them. Every time they went out to war, the hand of Lord was against them just as He had sworn to them He would do and they were defeated.

Again and again, God raised up judges for them who saved them out of the hands of their enemies. And as long as the judge was alive, the people obeyed God but returned to their corrupt ways upon the death of the judge. This triggered a pattern of times of peace followed by times of oppression even though they were in the land God had promised them. As I studied the lives of the judges God raised for the Israelites and the many battles the Israelites fought in their first few years in the promised land, it became apparent obedience always led to victory and disobedience to defeat. The art of warfare- their secret weapon- was obedience. It was not a physical (carnal) weapon and yet a highly effective one!

Obedience is still an effective weapon for many seen and unseen battles in our lives today. The bible assures us of us this fact. Now pay attention to this scripture:

The weapons of our warfare are not weapons of the world. Instead, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We tear down arguments and every presumption set up against the knowledge of God; and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

2 Corinthians 10:4-5 BSB

This scripture demonstrates obedience in action as an art and act of warfare. Even rogue thoughts, arguments, and presumptions that have been set up above the knowledge of Christ are torn down and held captive when obedience is at work. These strongholds, when submitted to the lordship of Christ are defeated just as the enemy nations of the Israelites were defeated and many times their strongholds torn down when the Israelites were living in obedience to God. In their obedience, they listened to and followed God’s plans in times of war even when the plan did not make sense. Shouting as they marched around a city, selecting men for battle based on how they drank water, falling in love with a Philistine woman as a battle strategy, regardless of how ridiculous the strategy may have seemed, the battle was always won because someone obeyed!

Last year, I went through a phase where everything felt like a struggle and battle. Many times, I felt God telling me to hold my peace and that he would fight for me. And did I listen? Of course not! I thought I had to take matters into my own hands and I kept spinning out of control until eventually I had spun myself into an intricate web of despair and defeat. I look back now and realize how obeying the voice and promptings of God not to say this or that, or to walk away, or to hold my peace etc. may have been an effective strategy to win the battles of 2022!

Have you ever been in a situation where you feel like you are in a fight of your life for things you should not be fighting for? Are you in the thick of a physical, emotional, psychological, or financial warfare? In addition to the many weapons in your artillery, add obedience and see God lead you into great victories! Here’s to winning our battles in the strength and might of the Lord with our secret weapon!

Yours Truly.

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Surrender

For the past few months I have been on a hiatus from writing but certainly not from God working on me to make me into what He wants me to be. While I have been away, I have spent time reflecting on the Israelites as they journeyed from Egypt to the promised land. and as I have read through their stories, the weight of being a sojourner here on earth has not been lost on me. As I grapple with where I am in life, where I have been, and my role on this stage of life, in contrast with the stories of the Israelites, there are two principles that have resonated with me: surrender and obedience.

Throughout the sojourn of the Israelites, God asked that they loved, served and obeyed Him. And what made the likes of Moses and Joshua successful in obeying God while most of the Israelites struggled was surrender. Surrender is the answer to our commitment to intimacy and obedience to God. Our intimacy does not come from where God has placed us or what He has given us. If that were the case, the Israelites of old would have been the most surrendered people. Surrender is a choice we have to make everyday; an active choice and not a passive happening.

Matthew 25 speaks to a parable that Jesus told and while there are many lessons to draw from this parable, today this parable highlights what active surrender looks like. In this parable, a man goes on a long journey but before he does so, he entrusts his wealth to his servants according to their abilities. To one he gave five bags of gold, to another two and to yet another one bag. Two of the servants understood that everything they had been given had to be surrendered to the will of their master and so they made a choice to invest the gold. The last servant took a more passive approach and instead of discerning the will of his master, buried his one bag of gold in the ground. He held on so tightly to what he had been given, unwilling to allow any transformation to happen with his bag of gold and he missed out completely in the end (Matthew 25:14- 30 paraphrased).

What are you holding on to so tightly? What have you buried so deep that you are unwilling to allow God to bring transformation and change to? What remains unsurrendered to the Master’s will? For me it has been my hurts and disappointments in people and circumstances, my time and my schedule, my abundance and my needs, my identity, my family, and my education. There have been many aspects of these areas of my life that I have held so tightly to my own way and I have been unwilling to surrender these parts. Like the servant that hid his bag of gold, I have tried to keep these areas under my own control. God has been teaching me to let go and surrender these parts to His leadings. Like the servants who had five and two bags of gold respectively ended up with better outcomes than they started off with, so will many things in my life have better outcomes if only those areas are surrendered to God. For starters, most of my strivings will cease and God will truly be exalted in my life (Psalm 46:10).

But here is the caveat: surrender and obedience walk hand-in-hand. Without obedience, one cannot be fully surrendered and without surrender one cannot wholeheartedly obey. I pray that in whatever God is calling you to obedience and surrender that you will have a heart that is inclined to listen and at accordingly and as you do so that transformation happen to the five bags of gold or the two bags of gold in your life for the glory of God.

Yours Truly

Posted on by intentional4christ

How wealthy are you?

With the rising cost of living and global inflation, it seems like a good time to take pause to ask, “How wealthy am I?” A few days to the close of 2022, one of the pastors was doing the call for tithes and offerings and she made a statement that has stuck with me for the past few months. She said, “our wealth is not measured in how much we have but in how much we give away” and that stopped me in my tracks. People who know me well know that I am very generous almost to a fault. I used to give freely of my time and resources without second thoughts but lately I have become stingy. I started noticing that people were either taking advantage of my generosity or not reciprocating and I felt cheated. I felt like I deserved better and so decided to hold back. Of course as with all my life’s decisions I presented my new found disposition to God and this is what He had to say about it:

Seeking recognition or recompense for a good deed done:

I was chatting with my sister a few month ago and she shared with me how God has been dealing with her in terms of seeking recognition and wanting people to repay us for our good deeds. She shared that in many ways when we do a good deed, when we are kind, and generous, we have acted as messengers of God and indeed we are, as the hands and feet of Jesus. Messengers are sent to deliver messages, goods or services and to report back to the one that sent them. If praises/ thanks are offered, the messenger is to be relaying that information back to who ever sent him/ her. Expecting to be repaid for our gratitude or seeking recognition for our generous deeds is like a messenger who goes to deliver a package on behalf of another and takes the credit for the content of the package without duly referring that credit to the one that sent him/her. As God’s hands and feet, he empowers everyday to bring hope to the world around us in various ways through our generosity of money, time, intellect, and resources. And yes while it feels good to be appreciated, we must remember that the ultimate glory MUST go to God and He WILL NOT share that glory with anyone. He is the rewarder of men and women and when we start to look to people for rewards for our good deeds, then we have totally missed the mark. Here are a few scriptures that come to mind to buttress this point:

My name is the LORD! I won’t let idols or humans share my glory and praise.

Isaiah 42:8 CEV

Feeling cheated because there appears to be no reciprocity and returns for my generosity:

A few weeks ago, I attended a worship seminar and the guest speaker said something that brought me to tears. He said, “God blesses the things in your heart that are a reflection of His heart.” The reason this simple statement convicted me so much is at that at the root cause of my dissatisfaction about being generous is the fact that I have felt like God does not notice. I have sometimes felt like a pushover because even though people have taken advantage of my generosity, I do not stop giving. I have often felt compelled by something greater than myself to be kind and loving and generous and lately because I have felt that it has gone unnoticed, I have been discouraged from pouring out so much of myself into others. At the heart of this issue is 90% the need for recognition and some returns for all my generosity and 10% compassion fatigue.

About compassion fatigue- Really and truly, there should be no room compassion fatigue when we are tapped into the source of compassion who is Love Himself. I have found when we take our eyes of Jesus who is our exceedingly great reward and we focus our eyes on what we think our reward should be- financial or otherwise- then we get compassion fatigue when the reward is not forthcoming. With our eyes on Jesus, how can we tire of being compassionate when His love flows through our veins? When His heartbeat for people become our life’s purpose?

So today as I take stock, these questions are very relevant, How wealthy am I? How much of my time, resources, giftings, intellect, money, worldly possessions do I give away for the benefit of others in service of my Master Jesus? In what ways am I the hands and feet of Jesus?

Yours Truly.

Posted on by intentional4christ

To the very day!

Have you every stopped for a moment to wonder if God knows about everything happening in your life? What about the billions of people on earth? Is He concerned with everything in their lives as well? What if I told you that everything that is happening in your life has been predicted by God right down to the very day (even second)? Would you believe it?

In Genesis 15, God visited Abraham while he was childless and promised him a child out of his own loins who would be his heir. Abraham, very skeptical of this promise because of his age, asked God for a sign and God made a covenant with him and showed him what the future of his descendants would be. God told Abraham, “Know for certain that for four hundred years your descendants will be a stranger in a country not their own and that they will be enslaved and mistreated there. But I will punish the nation they serve as slaves, and afterwards they will come out with great possessions.”

Fast forward to Exodus 12, and we see God giving instructions to the Israelites through Moses to get out of Egypt. God delivered the Israelites from the hand of the Pharaoh with plagues that culminated with the death of every firstborn male person and cattle but not before they had plundered the Egyptians of gold and silver. For many of the Israelites, and certainly to the Egyptians, it may have just been another day of God working wonders but this was no ordinary day. It was a day that God had predicted to Abraham many years before right to the very day.

Now the length of time the Israelite people lived in Egypt was 430 years. At the end of the 430 years, to the very day, all the LORD’s division left Egypt.

Exodus 12:40-41 NIV

Right to the every day… a day which may have started off as ordinary was not ordinary after all. It had been earmarked by God as a day of redemption and was very significant. God was not slow to keeping His promise of deliverance. It happened on the very day God had chosen for it, not a day before or a day after. Do you know that nothing that ever happens to you takes God by surprise? Do you know that even the mundaneness of our day have been foretold by God even before the day happens?

Your eyes saw my unformed body; all my days were written in Your book and ordained for me before one of them came to be.

Psalm 169:16 BSB

Sometimes it is easy to forget that nothing in our life is happenstance. Everything happens for a reason and if you are counted among God’s division, it happens for your good and for His glory sake. Everything about you, from your life’s first cry to final breath is laid bare before God and so nothing is a surprise for Him. This is very comforting particularly for me as I have been asking God what the next steps of my life ought to be. If you are praying for direction for one aspect of your life or another, may you be encouraged by these words, knowing that God’s counsel will never lead you astray because He knows how everything will turn out right to the very day! May this be your confidence as you:

Trust in the lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. Instead, seek His will in all you do, and He will show you which path to take.

Proverbs 3:5-6 BSB, NLT

Yours Truly